Another Damn Girly Song About Game

Following on the heels of “Call Me Maybe,” which Vox correctly typed as an archetypal game motif of the unattainable woman driven wild by an unattainable man, comes “Give Your Heart A Break” by one smoky-voiced Demi Lovato.

I’ll just go through a few of the lines and the loyal Badger Hut readers can shirley fill in the rest of the analysis.

The day I first met you
You told me you’d never fall in love
But now that I get you
I know fear is what it really was

Game principles: solipsism, rationalization. The woman cannot bring herself to accept the man’s words at face value, and instead constructs an elaborate counter-narrative that he is insecure and afraid because it allows her to avoid the reality that he’s not going to get attached.

Now here we are
So close yet so far
Haven’t I passed the test
When will you realize
Baby, I’m not like the rest

Game principles: attraction to aloofness, snowflaking. Frustrated by his preternatural emotional distance (which she has tried to invalidate as per above), she attempts to argue that she is the one special woman who is not going to hurt him.

Don’t wanna break your heart
Wanna give your heart a break
I know you’re scared it’s wrong
Like you might make a mistake
There’s just one life to live
And there’s no time to wait, to waste

Game principle: living in the moment. It feels right right now and has to be capitalized on!

The world is ours if we want it
We can take it if you just take my hand
There’s no turning back now
Baby, try to understand

Game principle: projection. In her mind, his mental model is the one that is busted. If only he understood her – if only his brain worked like hers did and he did what she wanted – then everything would be perfect, life would be so cool.

Capturing the wild and unattentive man is one of the most powerful female fantasies beamed through our popular culture, inextricably entwined with the “women civilize men” narrative. (Dalrock wrote about it this week, a great complement to his early gem on the other primary female fantasy of the “choice” narrative). But any game-aware man or woman who has been paying attention to the evidence in the field knows that it’s not just songs and shows – the “I can change him” modus operandi is epidemic among women in real life. Yes, even among “smart girls” and “good girls.” Like Jeff Spicoli with Forest Whitaker’s sports car, she plaintively intones “I can fix him!” Even women writing in the Manosphere are absolutely obsessed with a panty-soaking fantasy of making the aloof hunk realize that he should let his guard down and give in to his feeeeelings because she just really loves him so much.

Despite all the hand-wringing about how much women want “relationships,” women tingle for unavailable and uncommitted men, for those traits specifically, and project all sorts of stuff onto those men that obfuscates the basic truth – he ain’t in love with you and he’s not going to be.

There was even a study a couple months ago that during ovulation, women think their bad-boy flings are great father material. If there was ever something that should disabuse every bootlicking white knight of his delusional fantasy that putting on the Fred MacMurray act was going to get him to the top of the sexual heap and win the heart of his damsel forever, this is it.


Filed under media, music

12 responses to “Another Damn Girly Song About Game

  1. Vicomte

    That study should be cited as empirical proof that the rationalization hamster exists.

  2. i already posted about the “call me maybe” song and the neon hitch song “want you back”, back in march i think.

    as far as the demi lavato song. dude, she’s a former (allegedly) coke head cutter (actually she admitting to cutting). she’s hot, but you can just tell she has ZERO self esteem. her song is pure projection that she’s a “catch”.

    which may be true….until i make a mess on her tummy. the “call me maybe” chick has a leaked video of her giving HORRIBLE head to a guy. which i mentioned and sent a few readers links to. lol.

    most women in the entertainment business are the most susceptible to game. TRUST ME. the industry FEED a colossal void of self doubt as to their attractiveness.

  3. zorroprimo

    If there was ever something that should disabuse every bootlicking white knight of his delusional fantasy that putting on the Fred MacMurray act was going to get him to the top of the sexual heap and win the heart of his damsel forever, this is it.


  4. I call this the “Spock Effect”, after the tsunami of damp panties Leonard Nimoy inspired back in the 1970s. It’s not even so much about being the “bad boy” — it’s the fact that male attention, fascination, and interest seems to lie everywhere but with HER, and that drives her hamster nuts. His aloofness and distance give her the impression that he is driven and intellectually involved, and it becomes her MISSION IN LIFE to fuck up that perfectly-working smoothly running machine with a relationship.

    You’ve nailed it: solipsism, projection, snowflaking, hamsturbation, they’ll do just about anything to justify “saving” that poor man from himself.

  5. stevie tellatruth

    a new one for me. definition, please?

  6. How dare you take the name of Fred MacMurray in vain!

  7. jrc

    What about “there were tears in your eyes”?
    … maybe just allergies.

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  9. Georgia Boy

    The manosphere sort of ruined most female pop song lyrics for me. I have my own favorite examples of songs that people eat up that make my eyes wanna roll. I just hear most bubblegum pop songs in the voice of that hamster (not that the men are much better, I’ve seen threads in the manosphere before about how rock stars seem betatized now). I accept it now as them just being girls, it’s natural for each young starlet to want to live out the same old dramas for herself. Girls want to feel the highs and lows, not learn to be philosophical and outcome-indifferent.
    Some emotional detachment is fine for blunting my urge to call most of their music insipid. But as transparent as it seems, sometimes you still have just appreciate it for what it is and carry out your role. There’s nothing new under the sun, but having them around is better than just not bothering. Never forget the real truth of the SMP, but at the same time don’t forget to abide Commandment IX.

  10. BuckeyeBri

    Have another one for you. Cheryl Lloyd’s “Want U Back”. It’s a piece of aural tripe, but it’s a naked display of how Game works…

    [Very difficult to listen to, but illustrative nonetheless.]

  11. Urs

    Ha! I thought the exact same thing when I first heard that song: “Oh honey- he’s just not that into you.”

    Younger girls don’t seem to realize that guys are big boys that know when they like us – they don’t need us to tell them, remind them, or persuade them. It’s really not this much work, and if it is, then someone’s heart isn’t in it and it’s time to move on in the best interests of both of you. I only know because I was the same way, until I had a lightbulb moment. When a guy really likes someone, he will make sure she knows it. Duh! Why wouldn’t he?

    I don’t mean he’ll supplicate, I just mean that he will treat her the same as anyone treats anything they are passionate about – with time investment, interest, and a real desire to be around and involved. No excuses necessary!

    It’s not rocket science, but damn, we still really get it wrong sometimes.

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