Beta Bait Music: Trouble Me

I love 10,000 Maniacs, and I really like this song.

However, it’s sad to say it’s classic beta bait – guys may hear this kind of stuff and think it’s what women want, raw and emotionally labile.

Speak to me, don’t mislead me, the calm I feel means a storm is swelling;
Speak to me, there’s no telling where it starts or how it ends.
Speak to me, why are you building this thick brick wall to defend me
Speak to me, when your silence is my greatest fear?
Why let your shoulders bend underneath this burden when my back is sturdy and strong?

Ask yourself if you want to take romantic advice from a woman with Natalie Merchant’s style of frenetic dance moves.

As long as we’re on the topic:


Filed under beta guide, media

15 responses to “Beta Bait Music: Trouble Me

  1. dannyfrom504

    i had a HUGE crush on natalie merchant then i was in 8th grade. she reminded me of this girl angela that i never made a move on, but who i found out liked me as well. smh. and i’m a total douche for 80’s -90’s music. and yes i did drink the beta kool-aid at the time. *sigh* but by the late 90’s i was done with it. lol. i still love the music, but would NEVER take it as anything more than a good song.

    keep posting music from this era and it’s a done deal that i’m not going anywhere anytime soon. lol.

    btw…..what did you think of interpol’s “turn on the bright lights”?

  2. NMH

    Yup. It was, in part, this music that rendered me celibate for my teens and 20’s because it subliminally re-enforced the anti-game that I had.

    The thing to remember is that when you have a female cooing such sweet lyrics what she is fantasizing about is the alpha who makes her vag hum like a tunning fork, the bad-boy producer with ripped abs, a Beamer, and an attitude, that she dreams will dump her sleazy hook-ups and commit to her.

    Its hard to believe that women can be so pathetic, but alas its true.

    Once you have taken the red pill, its really hard to take woman literally. Its all about context *sigh*

  3. danny,

    Boy, you just wait until my post on Liz Phair.

    “i had a HUGE crush on natalie merchant then i was in 8th grade.”

    Not that anyone cares now, but I object to the Merchant-free 10,000 Maniacs billing themselves as such. The band was Merchant as much as it was any of the other musicians, and putting in another female vocalist just wasn’t the same.

    Don’t think I’ve heard that Interpol track. I go back and forth on whether Interpol isn’t just a Joy Division knockoff.

    I love music from the alternative era, the ironic thing about it was that by the time it went mainstream circa 1994 most of the good music had already been made. I had a young middle school teacher who was instrumental in exposing us to all the alternative/college music she swam in and its inheritors: REM, 10,000 Maniacs, New Order, Smashing Pumpkins, the list went on.

    We found out after middle school, to nobody’s surprise, that she was a lesbian; I’m sure she was a Lilith Fair regular.

  4. NMH

    Here’s a good R and B song from the late 1980’s that I like that pretty much explains a woman’s response to an alpha:

  5. dannyfrom504


    alright. i’m a HUGE joy divisiona fan, have the the box set. and i admit, that paul banks from interpol DOES sound a bit like ian curtis, but i NEVER associated the 2. EVER. do youself a favot and check out the deut that interpol put out. PHENOMENAL album. they had a few decent tracks on the subsequent albums, but TOTBL is perfect.

    and yeah, i’m with you on music from that era, i was in 7th grade when i first heard violent femmes, and i was DEEP into black flag, DK, misfits, bad brains, sex pistols, ramones…..LOVE my olde punk stufff as well.

    damn you badger. you found my achilles heel: 80’s-90’s music. lol. and i dig the british stuff too.

  6. dannyfrom504

    i apoligize for the typos on the last post, i JUST woke up and i’m a bit hungover. lol.

  7. dannyfrom504

    dude, i lost my virginity at 14. i get SO MUCH PUSSY in 8th-sophmore year in NO. it was just like being in a candy store. of course, i was a skater, spiked hair. but as much as i loved the music, i learned from my best friend about being kind of a dick to girls. he was a straight pump-and dump dude, and devirginized more than half my middle school. i was def more beta and actually liked girls, but i follwed his lead as per his seeing me not getting any. once i did more like him……..BAM!!!! mad pussy. it’s sad game we must play. smh.

  8. NMH

    @danny–I was a late bloomer (I think I sexually matured when I was 16) and I seem to remember something about late bloomers losing their virginity later in life, which happened to me.

    You appear to have the correct instinct with women. Mine, for reasons I will never understand (I’m serious), were, when I was 16, to fall in love and care and protect a woman unconditionally; sex would only be later after we were both crazily in love.

    Of course, I drove off women with this form of anti-game which I expressed either verbally or through body language.

    Still not clear why I was wired that way; maybe I just didn’t get enough pops of fetal testosterone in utero. Certainly, the socialization from feminist programming in the 1970’s when I grew up didnt help. It has taken me years to shake this.

    However, there is an upside to this: I have good net worth.

  9. dannyfrom504

    i think most american men grow up on the beta side. i had a sister i had to look out for. so i too was protective and what not.

    but once i started “noticing” girls i was fucking clueless and tried to appease them…..WRONG move. now, i had had some pretty alpha moments with girls before, but i wasn’t trying to get laid, i was just out for my own self interest. tbh my MOM taught me pretty decent game as in jr high. no joke, and my grandfather (mexican) is/was VERY alpha. he schooled on “man stuff”. it took me some fumblings in jr high and high school to learn. and of course the pussy assed 90’s “women want a sensitive man” horseshit doomed us. but, the biggest lesson i got was watching my sister (very beautiful girl) shit test her bf’s. and everything they did, i did the opposite when i got shit tested…..and it WORKED. that’s when i started making progress with women.

    look, i said from the begining on Riv’s site, i’m NO PUA. but getting laid isn’t the crux of my existence, my own personal journey and well being is. like Yohami said, “i kill big monster’s.” i can fight as readily as i can fuck. and doing both bring me equal satisfaction. but i’d totally prefer to slay the pussy than crush some dude’s nasal cartilidge.

    stay up bro.

  10. Guestopher

    There’ a Pink song about a guy who is a little too Beta for her liking. The lyrics are something like “Make me miss you”. It is something along the lines of wanting the guy to back off so that the guy can be aloof enough to give her stronger gina tingles.

    Found it: the song is called “Leave Me Alone (I’m lonely)”

    It’s really weird because I dated a girl who played it while we were driving and she said “What’s wrong with her? How crazy for someone to say that to someone they are dating!” …She broke things off a few months later because I was too Beta and she was “emotionally unavailable”. Anyone else want to go back in time and punch themselves in the fucking face?

  11. “Anyone else want to go back in time and punch themselves in the fucking face?”

    Dude, every guy who takes the red pill sees so many missed opportunities from his past.

  12. Anonymous Reader

    Funny, I have never liked Natalie Merchant because her singing style always seemed to include a nasty smirk not very far under the surface. That was long before I actually saw what she looked like on the stage…

    Consider this video by comparison. Yeah, I know, it’s Boomer stuff, the point is to contrast beta bait with something else.

  13. Aldonza

    Being a chick, I’m allowed to like Natalie Merchant.

  14. “Being a chick, I’m allowed to like Natalie Merchant.”

    I don’t need permission, she is switched on.

  15. Jennifer

    Nothing wrong with guys being open. Long as it’s not too soon or much ado about nothing.

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