I’m Just Sayin’

The Private Man posted tonight about an unfortunate tendency of rude and obnoxious women to excuse their verbal violence with markers like “I’m a woman who speaks her mind.”

While they are proud to carry the mantle of the “modern empowered female,” at the same time they are relying on the chivalry of a bygone age to protect them from blowback, in that they expect proximal men to keep the gloves on and not be rude to a “lady” in public.

This is part and parcel of the “you go girl” mantra we man-bloggers criticize so much, a schema in which women can fly the flag of modernity yet count on the vestiges of traditionalism to protect them from the consequences of their overreach. Private Man has even compiled a list of self-descriptive words that reveal (or highly suggest) that a woman might labor under the pretense that everyone around her needs to hear whatever negative thought emerges from her brain.

Sometimes they buttress their venal arguments with feminist mythmakings about past oppression like “my grandmother lived in a time when women weren’t allowed to have opinions!” despite the fact that granny’s mother lived most if not all of her adult life after the ratification of the 19th Amendment. And a man who says he’d rather not be with a woman with a defective verbal filter will get shamed with the fire of false dichotomy: “you can’t deal with a strong woman! You just want women to be barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen and pump up your ego!”

From knowyourmeme.com. This one's for you, Athol Kay

Shaking my head. It’s like any woman who practices a degree of discretion or tact is a scab, unforgivably betraying the feminist cause. Then again, we know that one of the stereotyped slogans of feminism has long been “act like the men do,” so perhaps saying obnoxious and offensive things fits with their twisted, caricatured perception of masculinity.

I don’t like to argue in conversation, but I can respect a person who can take it as much as they dish it out. However, male or female, I find “speaking my mind” types aren’t usually throwing out contrarian opinions on tax policy or the Police reunion tour – they’re delivering personal insults and unsolicited criticism, and then hiding behind the cheap rhetoric of “I’m just trying to be honest! Do you want me to lie to you?”

Anyway, the whole discussion reminds me of a great video I saw last week highlighting the fakeness of insulting someone and then excusing it with “I’m just sayin’“:

I’ve really enjoyed Karen Alloy’s videos (YouTube user spricket24), which surprises me because I don’t usually like snark, I’ve never so much as cracked a smile for Sarah Silverman. Maybe it’s because Alloy is snarking on my biggest personal peeves. I’m also very impressed with her facial and body language; expressive acting at point-blank range is not an easy task.

As long as we’re on the subject, I will admit to some personal double-bind bias here. If I find a woman to be complaining a lot, and she’s not very attractive, my mind will jump to the “she’s just angry she doesn’t get as much attention as the other girls.” But when an attractive woman is complaining, I usually default to “she’s just spoiled because she gets more attention than the other girls, she doesn’t know how good she has it.” It sounds like a can’t-win setup, but experienced strategists will note that there is a winning move…stop complaining.

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24 Comments

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24 responses to “I’m Just Sayin’

  1. 108spirits

    I zone out automatically when I hear a woman complain.

    I watched that clip without sound. Nice boobs, I mean body language. Don’t like listening to female comedians’s snark regardless of topic.

  2. Looking Glass

    I used to think that people that complained, were loud or just spouted off like they knew what they talking about had a good set of knowledge.

    So I set out to be able to talk like that, with authority. Found out none of them actually are talking anything but BS, now I just mock them with excessive mastery of what they don’t actually understand. The looks on a person’s face when you dismiss them facts is awesome.

  3. johnnymilfquest

    “However, male or female, I find “speaking my mind” types aren’t usually throwing out contrarian opinions on tax policy or the Police reunion tour.”

    I read the Mises Institute website and I have the “Message In A Box” compilation on my computer, so I’m the exception there Badger.

  4. criolle johnny

    The knee jerked and NAWALT responded, eh, milf?

  5. I think some people have found baseless complaining to be a great way to get attention and they may lack the people skills to attract attention other ways. It’s just another way to survive.

    I hope I am polite to men and I do expect them to be polite to me. There is some material online that criticises considering the feelings of men trying to chat one up – I guess I tend towards being as gracious as possible. As I get older I find myself less likely to take anything personally.

  6. johnnymilfquest

    @Criolle : It would be NAMALT or NAPALT in my case.

  7. John G

    Hi There;

    I think we see some ladies taking it a step further. Some are actually following up their verbal anger with actual violence and anti-social acts. Think those women in a McDonalds who beat the tar out of that transgendered person. Or the two that attacked the man on parole and he beat them severely w/a metal rod. Or the woman in Ohio w/the high speed chase. She was nearly nude and had three kids w/ multiple dads (an also a rap sheet). Some may call these people an outlier or declare their race or their geographical context (hillbilly, ghetto, whatever), but it’s becoming more prevalent. And I don’t think it’s due to the pervasiveness of the media either. Sure, NAWALT and all that, but everyone has to admit, it’s on the rise.It’s not something that scares me or skews my perspective, just an observation.

  8. just visiting

    @ johnnymilfquest

    Lew Rockwell rocks!

  9. ASF

    Women generally aren’t funny. See Hitchens’ essay in Vanity Fair. This girl has a nice rack and is pretty. Everything else is superfluous. Just sayin.

  10. johnnymilfquest

    @just visiting : I’m a big fan of Rockwell, Tucker, Kinsella and the rest of the Mises peeps.

  11. I didn’t even read this. That video, and that rack. Mmmmmmmmm. Danny likey

  12. 108-

    SHE SPOKE in the video. ORLY??!! I didn’t notice, let me watch it again…

    Huh, i’ll be darned. She DOES say words n stuff.

  13. Looking Glass,

    Your point relates to one I made a while back about ballbusters – a ballbusting attitude reflects insecurity; a competent, capable person doesn’t need to bully. The shouters just want to be heard because they think being heard means they are important and knowledgeable, when in fact nobody in their sphere has the guts to tell them to shut up.

    http://badgerhut.wordpress.com/2011/08/04/defining-ballbusters-and-in-defense-of-a-womans-accomplishments/

  14. Lulz at guys who discovered the video soundtrack after the first viewing.

  15. Lavazza

    Well, truth and honesty are virtues, but so is non-violence. Always deliver the truth in the most non-violent form possible, if you want to be virtuous. Save the most and kill the least. Not impossible at all for a virtuous person.

  16. Sweet As

    Yes, I agree.

    Foremost, in most social situations, applying ones Manners works amazingly well.

    There are times and places when complaining is ok — as it is largely venting, attempting to abate anxiety, and/or solve a problem. BUT, this shouldn’t be chronic for goodness sakes.

    And btw, women aren’t the only ones prone to it. :D “Just sayin’.”

  17. I added the phrase Just Sayin’ to my list of blocked phrases on my website. If anybody uses it in a comment, their comment gets moderated/deleted. I hate that phrase, and it’s almost exclusively used by women who comment on my blog. The phrase is used as a way to exonerate someone from being rude or critical. Hint: If you have to add Just Sayin’ to a thought or opinion, then that means you *know* what you’re saying is obnoxious. So either own that you’re obnoxious or don’t say anything.

    [Haha! Thanks for stopping by to comment.]

  18. SayWhaat

    Y’all are pervs. Just sayin’.

    [I've come to the conclusion that, because I think of women frequently, I must be a lesbian.]

  19. 108spirits

    I was staring at her brains but her boobs got in the way.

  20. NOT ME. all i could could think was…..

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